People mostly miss their loved one for many reasons. Breaking with a woman is really a hard thing to every guy and it is not very easy to get his girlfriend back. If you can't forget your girlfriend, don't be frazzled. Get your loved one back by doing what she likes. Sit and think! Do you really want her back? What went wrong? Is that your fault? Get answers for all these questions first and further get into a conclusion!
After deciding to get back your girlfriend then consider factors like, Was there another man? Is she still interested in you? Everything should be evaluated in a realistic manner. This will give you a clear vision on what to do, when to do and how to get back your girlfriend. Know the correct reason for the break up and change yourself. Correct your mistakes and be yourself as before, when she fell in love with you.
Develop attractive personality to magnetize your girlfriend. Call her for lunch every week; do everything she likes, care her very dearly, send gifts to her regularly. Show her yourself confidence and prove your true love and affection in better way. All these will generate bright sparks in your girl friends mind and heart, and obviously it will bring her back to you very safe.
There are the deliberately manipulative approaches, like dating other lady will make your ex come back. Women jealousy will show off when their boyfriend dates with other women. As soon as the other woman makes an entry into your world, you become a trophy between your current and ex girlfriend. This is very effective way to get back your ex.
One important thing that you must have to find is, ensure that your girlfriend also has a soft corner on you. This will give you a better idea to understand your girlfriend dearly closer and bring her towards your side. It is really important to be loyal and honest, while you express your love and care to her. There are quite several techniques you can follow to get your ex girlfriend back.
You can invite and take her to a coffee shop. Express your deep regrets for what has happened! If possible ask her, whether you can talk something about the situation that created troubles between you both. Because, this will be the best time to explain the tough time, you had before. You can also ask her, which made things wrong either your work, or your attitude or your character. This will surely bring a better understanding to bring your ex back.
If your girlfriend loves you to see really fascinating and gorgeous with cool pleasant wears, then give importance to her favorites. Consider and find out whether you have changed? This should be closely analyzed, because the girl really loved you as she felt you are really good and match her taste very close to her heart. Moreover, she must have loved you closer, as you were prompt in fulfilling her emotional expectations and needs. Behave with a positive attitude and express your bright smile to her. All these tips and techniques will help you to get back your ex girlfriend. Moreover, the girl will understand you much better than ever before.
Click Here to Read More..
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Monday, October 20, 2008
Relationships: Empathy Vs. Responsibility For Feelings
William grew up with a mother who was depressed much of her life. As the oldest of three children with a father who was not around much, William took on a lot of responsibility for his mother's wellbeing. He grew up as a kind and caring man, believing that he was responsible for another's feelings, especially a woman's.
Lauren grew up in a family where she received constant criticism from her father. From the time she was little, she had learned to try to do everything right in order to have control over getting her father's approval and avoiding his disapproval. Lauren learned early in life to make others responsible for her feelings.
As so often happens, William and Lauren got together at their common level of woundedness, with William feeling responsible for Lauren's feelings and Lauren making William responsible for her feelings. But it didn't take long for William to feel engulfed by Lauren's demands and to shut down as a way to protect himself from being controlled by her. The more William shut down, the angrier and more demanding Lauren got, and the angrier Lauren got, the more William shut down. Both felt deeply lonely in the relationship, each reacting to the other's wounded self.
As long as William believed he was responsible for Lauren's feelings, he was unable to feel any of his natural caring and empathy for her. And as long as Lauren believed that William was responsible for her feelings, she was unable to feel any of her natural kindness toward him.
The fact is that we cannot feel both empathy toward another and responsibility for their feelings at the same time. We cannot feel empathy for another when we feel burdened by responsibility for their feelings, or when we believe that the other is responsible for our feelings. As long as William continued to believe that he was responsible for Lauren's feelings, all he knew to do was shut down. As long as Lauren believed that William was responsible for her feelings, all she knew to do was get angry and blaming.
Fortunately, William and Lauren were willing to learn and practice Inner Bonding. William did deep work on understanding the sources of his wounded self's belief that he was responsible for Lauren's feelings, and was eventually able to let go of this false belief, as well as learn how to take responsibility for his own feelings when he felt attacked or pulled on by Lauren. As he developed his loving Adult, he was able to take loving care of himself while staying open and caring about Lauren.
Lauren did her own deep Inner Bonding work to finally let go of her long pattern of making others responsible for her feelings. She discovered that her current feelings of abandonment were not because of William at all, but rather because she so often abandoned herself by ignoring her own feelings. She discovered that the moment she made William responsible for her feelings, she felt abandoned because making him responsible for her feelings was an abandonment of herself. As she learned to take loving care of her own feelings, her anger toward William gradually disappeared.
This is the most important work any individual or couple can do to bring about their own happiness and improve all their relationships. Learning to take responsibility for your own feelings and not for another's feelings is vital for your inner peace, joy and loving relationships. Click Here to Read More..
Lauren grew up in a family where she received constant criticism from her father. From the time she was little, she had learned to try to do everything right in order to have control over getting her father's approval and avoiding his disapproval. Lauren learned early in life to make others responsible for her feelings.
As so often happens, William and Lauren got together at their common level of woundedness, with William feeling responsible for Lauren's feelings and Lauren making William responsible for her feelings. But it didn't take long for William to feel engulfed by Lauren's demands and to shut down as a way to protect himself from being controlled by her. The more William shut down, the angrier and more demanding Lauren got, and the angrier Lauren got, the more William shut down. Both felt deeply lonely in the relationship, each reacting to the other's wounded self.
As long as William believed he was responsible for Lauren's feelings, he was unable to feel any of his natural caring and empathy for her. And as long as Lauren believed that William was responsible for her feelings, she was unable to feel any of her natural kindness toward him.
The fact is that we cannot feel both empathy toward another and responsibility for their feelings at the same time. We cannot feel empathy for another when we feel burdened by responsibility for their feelings, or when we believe that the other is responsible for our feelings. As long as William continued to believe that he was responsible for Lauren's feelings, all he knew to do was shut down. As long as Lauren believed that William was responsible for her feelings, all she knew to do was get angry and blaming.
Fortunately, William and Lauren were willing to learn and practice Inner Bonding. William did deep work on understanding the sources of his wounded self's belief that he was responsible for Lauren's feelings, and was eventually able to let go of this false belief, as well as learn how to take responsibility for his own feelings when he felt attacked or pulled on by Lauren. As he developed his loving Adult, he was able to take loving care of himself while staying open and caring about Lauren.
Lauren did her own deep Inner Bonding work to finally let go of her long pattern of making others responsible for her feelings. She discovered that her current feelings of abandonment were not because of William at all, but rather because she so often abandoned herself by ignoring her own feelings. She discovered that the moment she made William responsible for her feelings, she felt abandoned because making him responsible for her feelings was an abandonment of herself. As she learned to take loving care of her own feelings, her anger toward William gradually disappeared.
This is the most important work any individual or couple can do to bring about their own happiness and improve all their relationships. Learning to take responsibility for your own feelings and not for another's feelings is vital for your inner peace, joy and loving relationships. Click Here to Read More..
Some Dating and Online Dating Rules for Women
Does it seem odd that online dating and dating would have designated rules for women? Well these are basic rules that you can use as a guideline to help you to avoid dating disasters. Many things can happen when you have no idea what to do on a date some things may be positive and some things may be negative. This may be a way of discovering each others personality, to be on the safe side ladies should follow these basic reminders when going on a date.
Person-to-Person Dating Rules.
Women have the privileges of going all out with their looks and this could be a great way of impressing your new date. A new look and a nice dinner outfit would do the trick.
Be as mysterious as you can be. Men love the challenge and if the women they encounter give them a hard time, they would keep hanging on till the end.
You may think it is shallow or irrelevant but most guys like a good body. You do not have to change your entire lifestyle or starve yourself to death to get the guy's attention, but by keeping a healthy body you have the power to wrap him around your finger.
When you're on a date you should observe whether or not your date is willing to pay for dinner and other expenses. Let him shower you with gifts. Later on if your relationship becomes more serious, show him that you are willing to pay for some of the bills as well.
The most important rule I would suggest to women is to never sleep with the guy on a first date. You are trying to establish yourself as a valuable person, so you must keep your dignity and mysteriousness intact by not giving in to him on the first few dates. If he refuses, you should dump him immediately. Respect, no matter, what is essential as the foundation of any relationship.
Online Dating Rules.
Refrain from emailing the guys first. Let them notice you through your wonderful online profile and watch as the responses start coming in.
You should block anyone who sends you vulgar messages. Don't be afraid to narrow down your choices for an online date.
In every online dating website, there is the Upload Your Photo feature. Maximize it by uploading your very best photo for all the men to see. Just make sure the photo doesn't have any nudity in it or else it will send the wrong message.
Just like in personal dating, be as mysterious as you can. Let the guys fill your inbox with hundreds of emails and chase you till the end until you find that one person that catches your attention.
No matter how tempting, never divulge contact information to your online partner.
Practice safe and secure dating. You may never know what can happen when you encounter a suspicious online member.
Choose an online username that captures how sexy and stunning you are as a lady. Click Here to Read More..
Person-to-Person Dating Rules.
Women have the privileges of going all out with their looks and this could be a great way of impressing your new date. A new look and a nice dinner outfit would do the trick.
Be as mysterious as you can be. Men love the challenge and if the women they encounter give them a hard time, they would keep hanging on till the end.
You may think it is shallow or irrelevant but most guys like a good body. You do not have to change your entire lifestyle or starve yourself to death to get the guy's attention, but by keeping a healthy body you have the power to wrap him around your finger.
When you're on a date you should observe whether or not your date is willing to pay for dinner and other expenses. Let him shower you with gifts. Later on if your relationship becomes more serious, show him that you are willing to pay for some of the bills as well.
The most important rule I would suggest to women is to never sleep with the guy on a first date. You are trying to establish yourself as a valuable person, so you must keep your dignity and mysteriousness intact by not giving in to him on the first few dates. If he refuses, you should dump him immediately. Respect, no matter, what is essential as the foundation of any relationship.
Online Dating Rules.
Refrain from emailing the guys first. Let them notice you through your wonderful online profile and watch as the responses start coming in.
You should block anyone who sends you vulgar messages. Don't be afraid to narrow down your choices for an online date.
In every online dating website, there is the Upload Your Photo feature. Maximize it by uploading your very best photo for all the men to see. Just make sure the photo doesn't have any nudity in it or else it will send the wrong message.
Just like in personal dating, be as mysterious as you can. Let the guys fill your inbox with hundreds of emails and chase you till the end until you find that one person that catches your attention.
No matter how tempting, never divulge contact information to your online partner.
Practice safe and secure dating. You may never know what can happen when you encounter a suspicious online member.
Choose an online username that captures how sexy and stunning you are as a lady. Click Here to Read More..
Are Watches Good Romantic Gifts For Women?
Many men and women spend hours looking for the very best romantic gift for their partner. They desire to give their partner the world and to give gifts that truly show their love for them. Watches are ideal romantic gifts for so many reasons. When your partner wears this watch that you have given them each day, they will think of you and only of you. How many other gifts could you give them that they could easily wear daily?
Watches are not just romantic, they are also quite practical. This is an unusual combination for a romantic gift. Your gift is one that will express the sentiment of, I love you, and it will also take good care of your beloved partner each day. Giving watches shows that you care that your partner gets places on times and knows exactly what time it is. It shows that you want them to think of time as valuable.
The watch is also a lovely symbolic gift in a romantic relationship. By giving watches as a romantic gift, you'll easily say just how precious time is with this person. That you are enjoying spending time with them. Perhaps you want to mark a special anniversary of a year, five years or even more time with your partner. Watches remind us all of just how time does fly. Giving a watch will remind your partner of the time each and every day.
Best of all, your watch gift is engravable. You can easily engrave this watch with a romantic saying of some type. Say something witty, funny, silly, sentimental just about anything you think your romantic partner would appreciate. Watches give you lots of engraving space so you'll easily be able to say quite a few words. Many people select a favorite quote or saying to engrave on a watch for their romantic partner. This is a lovely way to make your romantic gift even more special. Most romantic partners share a favorite quote that is their quote or even a favorite saying that they like the most. Adding this to the watch gift makes is more romantic and meaningful.
Sometimes your partner has had their eye on a particular watch for quite some time. You know exactly which watch to get them because they've mentioned it or you've even seen them shopping for it. You know exactly just how excited they will be to receive this watch gift. Other partners choose this gift knowing it will be popular, but that it will also be a surprise. Perhaps their partner has been wearing an older watch for quite some time. They may have been talking about getting a watch but just haven't gotten around to it. Your partner might have discussed the idea of getting a watch, but doesn't know where to start. Fortunately, you know their taste and have a strong idea of exactly what watch will suit them.
Giving watches as gifts in romantic relationships is a sign that you feel this person is very special to you. A watch is a meaningful gift and you wouldn't give this type of a gift to just about anyone. You'd only give this gift to someone that you truly cared about and wanted to make happy. There are so many reasons to select watches as gifts for your romantic partner. The best reason is that it will make them very happy!
Click Here to Read More..Are You Making Your Partner Break Up With You?
Sometimes a break up can catch you by surprise, but it's actually just as bad, if not worse, to be trapped in a relationship where neither person is in love any longer. Are both of you so insistent on being right that you can't give in? If you think your relationship is in trouble but cannot conceive of the inevitable, here are some things you might want to consider trying so you might be able to save it.
#1 Don't put all the blame on your partner.
All too often, we blame our significant others when things are going poorly in a relationship. He doesn't pay attention to what I'm saying. She shuts me out. Why doesn't he do nice things for me? I would do things for her if she did not bother me so much about them. It doesn't help anything when you blame your partner for the things that are going wrong. It just makes them defensive. Begin appreciating your partner for who they are instead of who you want them to be.
#2 Don't be so clingy.
It doesn't make for a healthy relationship when you cling to your partner constantly. Dependency is the cause of a large number of breakups. In a healthy relationship, your partner should want time on their own, and you should be okay with doing some things by yourself. If you are being especially needy and always want your partner around, it should be a clue to you that you need to develop other interests.
#3 How is your communication?
A vital part of any good relationship is good communication. Arguments, sarcastic comments, and snide remarks inhibit communication because they are demeaning and disrespectful. If you would not treat a friend like that, why would you treat a loved one that way?
#4 Stop trying to read your partner's mind.
Do you try to read your partner's mind and project thoughts that might not be true at all? You might think that your partner doesn't care for you just because they didn't immediately come to your rescue. If you keep paying attention to those voices in your head, you will only become more bitter.
#5 Have you been paying attention?
Do you pay attention to the things your partner is involved in? Do you pay attention to what they are saying and try to take it to heart? There are times when we are so insistent that we are right that we can't hear anything else. When you encounter another conflict, do not raise your voice -- instead, listen to your partner. You might hear something that is important, and you might find out that you are not always right.
Even if you do everything listed above, it might not be enough to really change your relationship. If you reach that conclusion, you will have to take time away from the relationship. You can use this chance to get a better look at things and then make a final decision. Click Here to Read More..
#1 Don't put all the blame on your partner.
All too often, we blame our significant others when things are going poorly in a relationship. He doesn't pay attention to what I'm saying. She shuts me out. Why doesn't he do nice things for me? I would do things for her if she did not bother me so much about them. It doesn't help anything when you blame your partner for the things that are going wrong. It just makes them defensive. Begin appreciating your partner for who they are instead of who you want them to be.
#2 Don't be so clingy.
It doesn't make for a healthy relationship when you cling to your partner constantly. Dependency is the cause of a large number of breakups. In a healthy relationship, your partner should want time on their own, and you should be okay with doing some things by yourself. If you are being especially needy and always want your partner around, it should be a clue to you that you need to develop other interests.
#3 How is your communication?
A vital part of any good relationship is good communication. Arguments, sarcastic comments, and snide remarks inhibit communication because they are demeaning and disrespectful. If you would not treat a friend like that, why would you treat a loved one that way?
#4 Stop trying to read your partner's mind.
Do you try to read your partner's mind and project thoughts that might not be true at all? You might think that your partner doesn't care for you just because they didn't immediately come to your rescue. If you keep paying attention to those voices in your head, you will only become more bitter.
#5 Have you been paying attention?
Do you pay attention to the things your partner is involved in? Do you pay attention to what they are saying and try to take it to heart? There are times when we are so insistent that we are right that we can't hear anything else. When you encounter another conflict, do not raise your voice -- instead, listen to your partner. You might hear something that is important, and you might find out that you are not always right.
Even if you do everything listed above, it might not be enough to really change your relationship. If you reach that conclusion, you will have to take time away from the relationship. You can use this chance to get a better look at things and then make a final decision. Click Here to Read More..
Free Online Dating Services For Relationships
Online dating service is not only free, but offer a lot of chances for both male and female date seekers to find their match. It is relatively easy and almost all of you with internet access can find dates through several dating sites available on the internet. With several social networking sites becoming more and more popular these days, looking for date opportunities through the internet could never be easier.
Finding dates through the internet have been so easy that a lot of people, especially females, handle their date seeking process with fewer cautions. Yes, free online dating service do save you from all the trouble of meeting with strangers, since you can get to know the person you are meeting with using chat or messaging features available on most online dating service sites, but it is not an excuse to be careless. You need to properly protect yourself; there are several online stalkers wandering around and the last thing you want is to be their target.
Protecting yourself, when it comes to online dating, is really not easy. The key is to provide sufficient personal information to allow people to get attracted to you, but not too much that you are giving away your privacy. online dating service offers complete safety, especially for female daters, and you should use such safety features to your benefits. It would be alright to post descriptions of you, and maybe provide a picture or two to let potential dates get to know you, but avoid posting personal information such as your phone number publicly. Make sure you take your time to get to know your dates before deciding to meet them. Besides, it will save you from having to go through bad dates, right?
For those of you having problems getting dates offline, online dating service can be the perfect solution for you. There are a lot of handsome men and beautiful women out there who have the same problems you are having, and they are available through online dating service sites. You will be able to chat with them and get to know each other; no more shyness blocking your dating opportunities this time. Once you are comfortable enough with your partner, the two of you can decide to take it to the next step and meet offline. This way, you will be able to protect yourself from all those dating problems and gradually build your confidence. You will be improving your love life without you even noticing. Before you know it, your success in online dating service will aid you with your offline attempts.
As you can see, online dating service offers great opportunities for all of you, both male and female, to be exposed to countless dating partners. You will be able to find the right date in no time. Plus, it is completely free; all you need is a nice cup of coffee and an internet access to get started. What are you waiting for? Explore the internet dating realms and find the kind of date you are looking for all this time. You'll be surprised to see how easy it could be. Click Here to Read More..
Finding dates through the internet have been so easy that a lot of people, especially females, handle their date seeking process with fewer cautions. Yes, free online dating service do save you from all the trouble of meeting with strangers, since you can get to know the person you are meeting with using chat or messaging features available on most online dating service sites, but it is not an excuse to be careless. You need to properly protect yourself; there are several online stalkers wandering around and the last thing you want is to be their target.
Protecting yourself, when it comes to online dating, is really not easy. The key is to provide sufficient personal information to allow people to get attracted to you, but not too much that you are giving away your privacy. online dating service offers complete safety, especially for female daters, and you should use such safety features to your benefits. It would be alright to post descriptions of you, and maybe provide a picture or two to let potential dates get to know you, but avoid posting personal information such as your phone number publicly. Make sure you take your time to get to know your dates before deciding to meet them. Besides, it will save you from having to go through bad dates, right?
For those of you having problems getting dates offline, online dating service can be the perfect solution for you. There are a lot of handsome men and beautiful women out there who have the same problems you are having, and they are available through online dating service sites. You will be able to chat with them and get to know each other; no more shyness blocking your dating opportunities this time. Once you are comfortable enough with your partner, the two of you can decide to take it to the next step and meet offline. This way, you will be able to protect yourself from all those dating problems and gradually build your confidence. You will be improving your love life without you even noticing. Before you know it, your success in online dating service will aid you with your offline attempts.
As you can see, online dating service offers great opportunities for all of you, both male and female, to be exposed to countless dating partners. You will be able to find the right date in no time. Plus, it is completely free; all you need is a nice cup of coffee and an internet access to get started. What are you waiting for? Explore the internet dating realms and find the kind of date you are looking for all this time. You'll be surprised to see how easy it could be. Click Here to Read More..
Tips to Stopping Your Break Up
Sudden breakups hurt, but a slow descent into a loveless relationship can be even more painful. Are both you and your partner stubborn, and do both of you refuse to budge an inch or reach a compromise? If you are trying to salvage a relationship that you feel is close to ending, try a few of these ideas.
1.) Blaming has to stop.
We are more apt to blame our partner when our relationships go sour. He just isn't hearing what I am saying any longer. She always seems so cold to me. Why can't he treat me better and surprise me with something nice for a change? I might be willing to do more for her if she did not nag me so much. If you are constantly putting the blame on your partner for everything that goes wrong in your relationship, it will only make him or her become defensive. Put aside your partner's shortcomings and pay more attention to who he/she is.
2.) Quit being so needy.
Not wanting to be apart from your partner is unhealthy. One of the most common problems that cause a couple to split up is an issue with dependency. You should not need your partner for menial things like shopping; being away from each other is normal and very much needed. You may need to find a hobby, other than your relationship, when you feel the need to cling to your partner all of the time.
3.) Are your lines of communication open?
A healthy relationship needs open avenues of communication. Arguments, sarcasm and snide comments are not communication and you need to learn to communicate with respect. Considering that you would not speak to friends or colleagues in that manner, why would you speak that way to a loved one?
4.) Stop believing falsehoods.
Are you constantly imagining the worst case scenarios concerning what you partner is up to or thinking? These are the little voices in your head that say your partner doesn't love you just because he or she is too busy to shower you with affection. Don't listen to those false voices, as they only give you an untrue version of what's real.
5.) Are you hearing?
Are your partner's interests something that you pay attention to? Do you really listen to what your partner is saying and give him/her equal time to explain his/her side? Sometimes we turn a deaf ear to all except what we view to be right. Talk in a normal tone and really listen to the other side of the story next time there is a conflict. You are not always the only one who is right, and you could be missing something that is important if you would just listen.
The above suggestions may not change anything for some relationships. You will both need some time apart if this is the case, because your relationship has suffered for too long. Use this time as a chance to get a better perspective and figure out what you really want. Click Here to Read More..
1.) Blaming has to stop.
We are more apt to blame our partner when our relationships go sour. He just isn't hearing what I am saying any longer. She always seems so cold to me. Why can't he treat me better and surprise me with something nice for a change? I might be willing to do more for her if she did not nag me so much. If you are constantly putting the blame on your partner for everything that goes wrong in your relationship, it will only make him or her become defensive. Put aside your partner's shortcomings and pay more attention to who he/she is.
2.) Quit being so needy.
Not wanting to be apart from your partner is unhealthy. One of the most common problems that cause a couple to split up is an issue with dependency. You should not need your partner for menial things like shopping; being away from each other is normal and very much needed. You may need to find a hobby, other than your relationship, when you feel the need to cling to your partner all of the time.
3.) Are your lines of communication open?
A healthy relationship needs open avenues of communication. Arguments, sarcasm and snide comments are not communication and you need to learn to communicate with respect. Considering that you would not speak to friends or colleagues in that manner, why would you speak that way to a loved one?
4.) Stop believing falsehoods.
Are you constantly imagining the worst case scenarios concerning what you partner is up to or thinking? These are the little voices in your head that say your partner doesn't love you just because he or she is too busy to shower you with affection. Don't listen to those false voices, as they only give you an untrue version of what's real.
5.) Are you hearing?
Are your partner's interests something that you pay attention to? Do you really listen to what your partner is saying and give him/her equal time to explain his/her side? Sometimes we turn a deaf ear to all except what we view to be right. Talk in a normal tone and really listen to the other side of the story next time there is a conflict. You are not always the only one who is right, and you could be missing something that is important if you would just listen.
The above suggestions may not change anything for some relationships. You will both need some time apart if this is the case, because your relationship has suffered for too long. Use this time as a chance to get a better perspective and figure out what you really want. Click Here to Read More..
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